Something tells me that this month doesn't look like it would augur well for me like the last one. Hope this month goes on peacefully around the world. There's a bit of self-interest there. Why this year and not the last one or the one before that? I don't know. As I said something tells me!
My instincts are never wrong. If I look back, everytime I went against my instincts I got into trouble. Let me tell you, whole lot of big trouble. Life and death kinda trouble. Didn't quit when I had to. Didn't run when I had to. And so on.
I can proudly say that I have been venturing into unchartered waters for so long, I don't even know if I will ever see that land again. It's kinda interesting, as you don't have to think very far ahead. It's been very simple day to day decisions. Work, booze and sleep. Maybe watch a movie or two in the process.
I got one of the best advice anyone could give to me at the time of my trouble. You have not committed a crime, then why are you running?. Well, he said it in a more emphatic way in his own style, a style that's only unique to him. That's correct, why am I running? I have not done anything unlawful. Well, I am not running now. I have gone and in a safe and well trusted environment. I don't know. Maybe by running, certain things could have been avoided.
Fear is a funny thing, quoting someone or something. Philosophical bent of mind always asks why? Can fear be overcome? Can fear be rationalized? You can't as it seems to be triggered from that part of the mind that has no consciousness. Maybe you can with sufficient training.
Whatever it maybe, the question is what if I would never be able to find or know the Truth behind God's creation? I don't know who said, but I think it's Carl Sagan, that, God needed humans to marvel His work. Have I lost the chance already?
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